I'm really starting to get irritated

at being single. I know I know sometimes it's really nice not to have to answer to anyone, and have flings and blah blah blah. Yea it's not so bad. But goddamnit I really miss having someone to go to bed with. Oh and the anytime sex is nice too. Having someone who really digs you to hang out with is usually pretty sweet too. Years ago I had to learn how to be alone. And I did, mostly by running away to Spain. That's a whole other blog in itself. Nevertheless, I learned how to be alone, and be OK with it, so I am capable of being alone and not going entirely insane. However, during the years I also learned that while I can be alone, I dont like to be. Ever. In fact, I crave company, of any kind. Being alone with myself (and my bizarre thoughts) severely upsets me. And I'm so neurotic I often wonder how likely it really is that I'll be alone forever, just passing the time with random boys here and there. Hanging out with friends who aren't permanent, and drinking more often than I should, because it's one of the few things that keeps my mood up. Sorry this blog is so fucking depressing but today fucking sucks.